Educationalist

For a while now I have been feeling absolutely terrified at the idea of my future. The whole way through my life so far I've been in the education system, always with a goal at the end: I completed primary school to go onto high school, I completed high school to go on to college and I completed college to go to university. What has seemed really scary though is what happens after university. Of course the long term goal is to get a job that I like and earn a good living and everything you expect from someone who grew up in a capitalist society. But honestly, the thought of getting that job and settling down into a routine with no foreseeable end goal has scared me.

No matter how long I've been focusing on a certain area of study, I've always known that I was doing it to reach a certain goal. That was the purpose of my life at that time. When I'm in university its the same, I will be graduating in a few years and then I'll have to figure out what I'm doing then. I think I'll be able to do that, I've done it before. Its the idea of figuring it out though that has started to scare me. All I can see from that point is finding a job I love and then stopping. I've comforted myself before by thinking something along the lines of "Then I'll get married and have kids and my life will progress through them" but I've always just seen myself in the same type of job, doing the same thing career-wise for the rest of my career. That lack of change in that part of my life is definitely scary to me.

I had a lecture today that helped me to think in a more positive way, though. We were being taught about an educationalist called Sir Ken Robinson who, in my opinion, has brilliant ideas about the education system and where it should be heading. Sitting there today, I started thinking that I really don't think I would mind becoming an educationalist and trying to create positive change in the education system. Honestly, that made me quite excited and gave me a new perspective. I've never thought about doing anything like that before but now the thought is there I'm liking it.

I feel like now I have something else that I can go to if I ever get bored of teaching or whatever other work I end up in after I graduate. It no longer feels like I will meet a dead end one day in my career, it feels like there are exciting new possibilities that I can achieve and work towards when I feel I need to. Even if I find myself perfectly happy in the work I end up in for a long time then at least I'll have another possibility that I feel like I would be able to do well.